My Top Ten Movies About Mother/Daughter Rivalry/HOLLYWOOD MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS

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The Bottom Line Since having my own daughter, I've thought about this topic with guilt, sorrow, and 
apprehension. Nothing to do but have mom over, drink wine, and watch one of these movies.

1. Real Women Have Curves:

Perfect for first or second generation Latina daughters, especially while you're still young. Some of the protagonist's coming of age experiences and mouthing off will lose their potency once you are much older than she is.

2. Pieces of April:

This is highly relatable if you were the black sheep of the family, but the mother is probably much meaner than yours ever was, even if you did throw matches at your sister. When April's neighbor tells her she is a bad girl, prepare to glance meaningfully in your mother's direction when she says "No - I'm not!" It's also fun to see Tom Cruise's stepford babymama with tattoos and greasy hair.

3. Thirteen:

I don't recommend watching this one if you have a little daughter of your own - the story of two thirteen year olds out of control is far too frightening! But if you were a naughty teenager, now it's your mother's turn to glance at you meaningfully while you think about all the pain you caused her. Prepare the Kleenex for the end when the mother physically forces her daughter to accept her hug while both cry.

4. Heavenly Creatures:

If Thirteen hits too close to home, hopefully this film about two teenage girls who become such good friends they feel the need to kill one of their mothers during a lovely walk in the New Zealand countryside will be far outside the realm of your experience. This Peter Jackson film delivers great performances from the two young stars, including a teenaged Kate Winslet, and the most incredible claymation scenes I've ever seen integrated into a film.

5. Flowers in the Attic:

This is a horrible movie - a schlockbuster of the highest degree - but I can't resist it, and neither can my mother. We get nostalgic for the times when I rented this for my fifth grade slumber parties and she made cringeworthy attempts to mingle with my guests. At least the movie doesn't include the incest from the book. Both of you will cheer when the spineless, selfish mother strangles in her own wedding dress.

6. The Jacket:

The mother-daughter story in this movie is revealed through a mental patient (Adrian Brody) whose drastic treatments allow him to visit the future. His desire to change that future affects the lives of a little girl he met on the roadside and her alcoholic mother (Keira Knightly and Kelly Lynch). The plot is complicated and some of the scenes are very disturbing, but it's an excellent choice for the chick-flick averse.

7. Spanglish:

No post 2004 mother/daughter movie list could be complete without Spanglish. Like other James L. Brooks films, the plot is driven by the dialogue, and the performances are understated and vulnerable. Adam Sandler does a good job as the mild mannered husband, but the real interest comes from the three different pairs of mothers and daughters - an upper-middle class housewife with her teenaged daughter, the same woman with her functionally alcoholic mother, and their immigrant housekeeper with her young daughter.

8. Mermaids:

This isn't a great movie, but it's fun. If you're my age (25) you probably have a big girlcrush on Winona Ryder, and if you're my mother's age (50) it's likely you adore Cher. A fun soundtrack, itty-bitty Christina Ricci stealing the show as the kid sister, and a scrumptious handyman on hand to deflower Ryder make this worth a rental if you didn't see it in 1990.

9. Little Women (1933 and 1994)

Invite your sisters and aunts for this one, but don't watch them back to back. The 1933 version is a classic, starring Katherine Hepburn at her most energetic and beautiful, and is clearly the better of the two versions. However, Susan Sarandon's performance as Marmee is far more relatable to contemporary audiences, Christian Bale is a much better Laurie than that dandy Douglass Montgomery, and no young actress of the 90's (my personal bias aside) could have made a better Jo than Winona Ryder. Either version will be a crowd pleaser that will make the whole room feel warm and affectionate toward one another.

10. The Joy Luck Club:

No matter what your race or age, this movie about the hopes and dreams of mothers for their daughters in four different Chinese families will move you. Watching this movie with your mother is not to be undertaken lightly, but it's worth doing. Ever since having a daughter of my own, I can't get through the first ten minutes without crying. The leads give excellent performances, the script is well adapted from Amy Tan's excellent novel, and the scenes of the mother's memories of their pasts in China are beautifully shot. Although the film is a major tear-jerker, there are several moments of humor.